A few years ago, I posted a list I’d found on the web of “50 Reasons Not To Date a Graphic Designer.” Well, in a moment of boredom when faced with a blank Google search screen earlier I thought I’d try looking up reasons to date a Graphic Designer.
Lucky for me, there was a list in existence! (Who would imagine?) Thanks to Kitkat Pecson, I have 50 new reasons to feel like a semi-decent human being. A pretty good list in itself, I have to say she got it pretty much dead on. Be sure to check out her website. And, naturally, I made my own snarky comments in red italics on ones that particularly hit home.
- You can finally talk to someone about that obscure band you love so much (an intelligent conversation, not “LOL SUCH A HEEPSTER HURR”)
- We live exciting lives — you can’t be boring and design well.
- We actually appreciate gifts from the bookstore! And useless things that look cute. (I CANNOT emphasize how true this is.)
- You aren’t pressured to be as punctual as a Japanese bullet train. (I will be late to my own funeral.)
- You get free portraits.
- Your presentations will never be the same again.
- You’ll know where all the off-beat cafes are.
- You’ll walk past toy store displays and be able to identify superheroes other than Spiderman.
- We don’t care about money. If we did, we would have attended law school. (You would already know this if you’d seen my car.)
- You’ll begin to think in Gotham and Aller.
- You can protest against SOPA and actually know what you’re talking about.
- It’s cool to date visual artists. It’s like dating a rock star or mountain climber. Insta-cool.
- You get updated about upcoming art events 2 seconds after the first tweet.
- You can start feeling smug about identifying illustrators/designers by the visual style. “Oh, that’s a Smithson for sure! Look at the savage lines and the social commentary. So Smithson.”
- You can tell everyone you’re attractive because artists appreciate you.
- You can start calling yourself the Muse of your loved one and perhaps future history books will mention you. “In the 21st century, the digital artist Smithson kept a Muse named Jane Doe, who pushed him to his very limits artistically and intellectually.”
- We can sympathize with your hate for numbers. (Oh, the raging burning never-ending constant fiery hatred which never ceases.)
- We will be rendered awed and worshipful by your fluency with numbers (or any equations that start including those letters and squiggly bits).
- We watch tasteful and funny television shows, like Doctor Who, Big Bang Theory, Sherlock, Modern Family, Community, documentaries on Nat Geo, etc. (I have not seen any of these, although I do hate Big Bang Theory with a burning passion. However, I also hate ‘fun’, or so i’ve been told.)
- We’ll never run out creative ways to compliment you.
- We’ll call a fast-food dinner a pleasantly low-brow date.
- If it doesn’t work out, you can refer to our relationship as a piece of art, like “The Summer of Glitter and 3-shot Espressos”.
- Someone will finally teach you how to use Photoshop! Praise God! (Oh how I worship thee, great Photoshop.)
- We have a great knack for the deeper meaning of life.
- When you get married, you’ll have the nicest wedding invitations. Ever.
- We are tech-savvy, except for accounting software.
- When we make handmade gifts, we make really good ones.
- We know all the really funny blogs, designspiration sites, and wacky art sites. Procrastination will never be the same again.
- We have a good eye for knick knacks and bargains.
- We know all the tricks for reducing file sizes and sending them speedily. (Why are you trying to send a video to me through email? That’s just not right.)
- We make you feel cosmopolitan. Your officemates at the bank will be so jealous that you’re dating some hot adventurer with dyed hair and a taste for music festivals.
- We will help you polish up your Facebook profile (begone, awkward-angle self-portraits, hello DSLRs).
- We followed our passions instead of our wallets, which makes us enthusiastic and wonderful people. Plus karma points too.
- We don’t mind if you ask us to take your picture again and again just to get the right shot. (Seriously, ask my friends. Then see #35.)
- We have really kooky friends.
- We point out things you’ve never noticed before in films, such as the production design or cinematography.
- We manage to make our problems sound so beautiful, you’ll wish you had them too.
- We can express ourselves through other art forms, like music.
- We’ll show your our .tifs. Ha. Ha. Ha.
- We are very well acquainted with the colors of the rainbow.
- We eat good food because we take pictures of it.
- We’re so sensitive. And we look good when we’re sad.
- We squeeze as much beauty as we can out of everything, so we’re certain to have a kickass relationship.
- We have memories like elephants. “Where’s the file, where’s the file… ah! printthis_nothisone_forreal.jpg”
- We’ll never tell you that you look fat in those jeans. We’ll say something like “Those jeans just don’t suit your well-rounded personality. And they’re not teal enough.”
- We point out interesting things like that unicorn-shaped cloud or that brightly painted door.
- When we rebel, we rebel in style.
- When something embarrassing happens to you in public, we’ll jump in and pretend it’s an art performance.
- We can understand doctors’ handwriting.
- The conversations you have with us are the kind wherein, 3 hours later, you wonder how the hell we go to this topic but it doesn’t matter because it’s funny!